Concerned......

Mark and I both had physicals yesterday (still need to do our normal blood work thing as we had both eaten). The doc find a lump on my breast... a fibrous cyst she is certain. I knew it was likely only a matter of time before I would have one (or more with time) of these as my mother has had these for as long as I can remember. My mom always has a biopsy after each mammogram. So far, she has not had any cancerous concerns, but then we all know how big BC (breast cancer) is in woman. While I am not too concerned for myself YET I am still worried about the unknown. You just never know what is really going on in your body today or possibly tomorrow.

Now, something of more concern and top priority is my husband's health. I do not want to go into too much detail yet, not until he has some tests done (that I am demanding this coming week instead of later as originally scheduled).... but today he nearly got into a car accident with myself and both kids in the car... thus heighten my concern.

Please pray for Mark's health... as I am quite worried at this point... not knowing what is going on for sure.

A good man has moved on to more things....

Watch the video clip on the Newman's Own site. Paul Newman was an example of a good person! A person who had wealth and fame and used it for true good!!! Plus he was loyal to his wife when so many in high fame profiles are not. Oh... he was good eye candy too!! :) I am very sad to know he is no longer in this world.
www.newmansown.com/

He also claimed that he never read reviews of his movies.
"If they're good you get a fat head and if they're bad you're depressed for three weeks," he said.

To read more:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/obit_newman

Are you normal about sex?

You Are 70% Normal About Sex

You're so normal about sex, it's a little scary. Your sexual attitudes and experiences match up with most other people. Like everyone else, you're a little naughty and a little traditional. You enjoy sex, but you're not a total freak about it!

http://www.blogthings.com/areyounormalaboutsexquiz
Are You Normal About Sex?

Wordless Wednesday

My BIG girl is in PANTIES!!!!!

Third post for today... watch out!

My sweet girl is officially potty trained!!! Yes, she is in panties full time (minus nap and night time) and has been for 3 solid weeks (this is week #4). She has a few accidents here and there, but fewer each week. After much stress on my part (as I was pushing her more than I should have), I had decided to just let it go as it is so not something to stress over. I also got over the whole in public thing... still hate the whole germ part about it but then she cannot live in a bubble! Anyway, I swear that the very next day after I decided to stop fighting her with the whole thing, she was ready to for panties all the time. Last weekend, I brought back her little potty as I thought that might help more with the #2 (more accidents with this). She is know peeing in the little potty most of the time, but then she empties it into the toilet on her own, lol. I think that is cute! She is such a big girl and I am so proud of her!!! However, I am also sad.... my little girl is seeming more and more grown each day! She is only 2.5 weeks from being 3 years old!!!! She has grown up so much since May!! I know some of that is because she seems more grown up compared to Connor but also some b/c she is all about being the big sis. I also realize that I do not have the alone time with her that I used to have, so she seems to be changing at a faster pace.

Since Connor's arrival, I often think about all the things he does each day... the new things he discovers, etc. At the same time, I realize Kaya has changed so much too!!! I love them both so much and love their interactions.... but I most admit, there are times were I crave more alone time with Kaya. I am planning to take Kaya to the pumpkin patch w/o Connor... I know she will enjoy the alone time with me too! She was cute the other day and ask for me to take her swimming (usually something she does with Mark). I will take girl time with my fav girl ANYTIME!!!

Scary moment....

Ever think about what you would do if your child was in a pool bobbing in the water unable to touch the bottom?? Well, I have wondered how and what I would do in said situation..... but this situation was reality the weekend before last. I was holding Connor when I asked 'where did Kaya go?' and then looked over at the pool to see Kaya's head above water in the middle of the pool. She had jumped into the pool and doggy paddled to the middle... mind you, I did not see her jump in as I had not been looking at the pool b/c she was playing on the water slide. I had told her when we got there not to get in the pool w/o me, but she is used to Patterson where she can just walk into the pool (she still has to have one of us with her as I do not let her go in by herself). Well, the only thought that entered my mind at that very moment was to jump in and get her in my arms, so I handed Connor off to the closest person and jumped in to Kaya. Surprisingly she was doing really good doggy paddling (swim lessons did pay off after all), as she did not cough up a ton of water after I grabbed her. She was scared... I could tell. After having her safely in my arms, I cried and told her not to ever do that again.... reminding her that she had to have myself or Mark with her when she went in ANY pool. Oh, I then realized I had my cell phone in my pocket, lol. The thing dried out and works just fine.

That was one of those moments where I was VERY thankful for the outcome but left wondering 'what if'?! Now, that was the second 'what if' moments in the first two weekends in September, so I am SO done with those moments for a LONG time!!!!! I always try to learn from things, both the good and the bad.... so my take on this moment along with the B&E..... appreciate the little things with my kids (they are healthy along with myself and Mark.... what more can I ask for) as that is all that matters in the end. Of course, I continue to get clouded by the craziness of life..... but I feel very blessed for my two kids, my husband, my extended family and friends that I call family. Hug your babies extra close!

Long time, no blog!

I guess it has been awhile, lol. My blog vacation began with being a little late finishing Connor's 4 month letter (which has been done for a few weeks) and not posting it (still need to do that, lol)... then I made a brief blog about 9/11. August was a hard month for me personally and September has been an extra busy month, so the combo has kept me from wanting to blog at all. At any rate, I am going to sum up on things of late!

Planning and scheduling guru (attempting to get into a better groove of planned things for K's energy level, but C is not the biggest fan of schedules, lol.. still doing a lot more regular activities though), staining the deck, taping a ton of red paint swatches to the living room wall in hopes a color will come to me, average B&E (see below for more),remembering 9/11 and all that day means to USA and myself personally, taking the time to be super goofy with K&C and enjoying C man's full belly laughs, starting to attend a church that all of us really like (K thinks they have candy there a lot... side note, she thinks Jesus looks like Elvis, lol.. that is my girl), going to a GNO at a different church and having a BLAST (hung over the next morning from the Zumba and laughing so much), planning K's bday festivities and Christmas trip (CA and OR bound to see my mom and all of Mark's fam), really enjoying a group picnic with my mom's group (our first big group event in WAY too long). Oh and Mark is out of town this week, so I am single mom for the week, lol. I am enjoying my me time in the evenings minus worrying about another possible B&E while Mark is gone. So, there is the summary, lol. Now to expand on just one, lol.

B&E stands for Breaking & Entering as in our garage was broken into the night/morning of 9/5. All that was stolen were tools (huge Craftsman tool set that I had just gotten Mark for his bday this year and that he wanted so badly so he would not have to borrow tools anymore), cordless drill with all the components including drill bit case (really nice drill too that Mark has had for as long as I can remember) and a gas can with no more than 1 gallon of gas! Who cares at all about the gas can (dumb ass kids) but the other items were bigger of course. It has nothing to do with the items stolen even though it is a good $500+ worth of stuff... $500 deductible on our home owner's, so no claim there.... but we are barely keeping our heads above water financially with me bringing in a $0 paycheck every month, lol. Guess Mark knows what he is getting for Christmas now... we had planned to use xmas money on a SLR but not now I guess. Mark was beyond pissed when he discovered what had happened... fists pounding the table in front of me and Kaya and all. I then calmly took Kaya inside for some tv time and told Mark to call the cops while I went with Connor to a few neighbors to ask if they had heard anything. The shitty thing was that I was awake most of the night (till 3am+) and should have heard something. Anyway, the tools and cordless drill are items that can be replaced, might you not the same ones as they do not sell the drill anymore and the tool kit is not available in the exact set anymore... plus I got that thing BIG time on sale (regularly almost twice the money I paid for it). I began to have a major panic attack thinking about how close my kids doors are to the door leading to the garage and what 'could' have happened. While we are convinced this was the work of some very stupid kids going to use the tools on their cars or something, you just never know. The guy at Home Depot (as we were buying more locks and such to make our house like Ft Knox, lol) said often something like that is from someone you know. Nice thoughts to put into my head A-HOLE!!! Things like this can happen ANYWHERE, but this is our first B&E besides for car break ins (2 or 3 in past). One of my fears is B&E in my home and snatching one of my kids.

So, now Mark and I look at our nice neighborhood through different eyes and for that, I am most pissed about what some people will do just to get some crap w/o paying for it! We have more locks on all doors (Mark is proud of his Ft Knox look going on, lol), we keep the light on outside every night, we are getting our security alarm fixed and I am going to learn to use a gun (something I have wanted to learn for some time anyway... we have a number of weapons in our house and hey, you just never now). I have told Mark that I would likely shot myself in the ass if we had an intruder!!!!!

Always remember....

As an American, I will not forgot this day 7 years ago. We were living in CA at that time, so it was 3 hours earlier than east coast time. Both Mark and were asleep having hit the snooze a few times. I dreamt (or thought it was a dream) that a plane had hit a building (this came from hearing the radio reports from the alarm clock as it would turn out). I awoke to the phone ringing. As I answered the phone (still partly asleep), it was my mom's assistant and she said "Your mom is ok". I said "what do you mean she is ok?". Then after a few moments of conversation and realization that my 'dream' was not that but reality....... I remember complete disbelieve as I watched the tv. I remember thinking I was having an out of body experience. I called into work to see if we would work that day. After hugging Mark extra tight, we both left to our jobs. I got to work where no work was done as we were glued to the radio and internet (we did not have a tv). My boss called in to tell us all to go home in the exact words "today is not a day to work". I spent all day glued to the tv watching this horrible dream unfold.

I spoke to my mom at some point that morning after continued attempts to get a line, all the while worried about her not knowing for sure where she was (her business was with Congressional members, so there was a chance she had been close to the Pentagon). She was in DC on business (which I knew). She was one of those people who was 'stuck' and could not fly out. She was able to rent an SUV with numerous other colleagues, and the drive cross country began. They drove stopping only to pee, etc and to drop off the respected people in the car. It took 48 hours for my mom to get from DC to Sacramento. As I mourned for my country and all that were lost that day, I was thankful my mother's business was not at the Pentagon nor the WTC.

A day I will NEVER forget....... one of those that stands out for so many reasons. I often think of the innocence lost that fateful day. The innocent lives lost along with the men and women trying to save those lives, but also the innocence of an attack on our soil in my lifetime. I am always grateful for all the men and women who fight daily for my freedoms as an American.