Vision for 2008.....

Tis the time of year for promises to change or at least making a list of things you want to change... so hear ya go.

My vision (as I am choosing to look at things right now) for 2008 is TODAY!!!!!
TODAY = being into today and really being happy with that!!! I have said SO many times to myself that I just need to enjoy the moment, for the moments are really limited. I have had MANY events in my life that have forced me to slow down and breathe and to see the simple things. After such events, I am recharged to go back to more a more simple lifestyle, and I do for awhile... then it fades over time. Then I worry about the dumb things (as I like to call them) like "being a certain way b/c I think I need to be" or "worrying about money spent on everything" or "poor me about ". OK... reality is reality... and NO one is perfect!!! I will be FAR from perfect in 2008, that is one promise I can make and stick to for the whole year, my whole life! I know there will be MANY times where these quotes will entire my mind and come out of my mouth... but I am longing to find that person deep down inside me... the person who enjoys just playing, enjoys the simplicity of sunshine (ok, there is nothing simple about sunshine but that is another post, lol), and enjoys just being in each moment. I think that is my biggest struggle of late (ok, for a LONG time)... I can enjoy the fun of just playing with Kaya... then I look around and my mind starts racing with not only all the cleaning I need to do but also all the things I want to fix in this house (irony of owning a home... makes me miss renting, lol).

All and all.... that person, the simple one, is still there... often fighting with the other person within me, lol. In most things, I tend to go with the simple choices... simple tastes, simple desires (well, hubby might disagree, lol, but he would agree after pushed), simple style (that hasn't changed much over the years), simple wishes. BUT one thing I am always saying "I have to do because I just have to".... well this saying does NOT fit in my simple lifestyle... as in that world, my lifestyle is completely in my control and there is nothing I say I "have" to do (besides for maybe showering, lol) instead I say I "want" or "enjoy" . The reality is.. everything is a choice!! Getting out of bed is a choice, going to work/not going to work is a choice, just playing with my daughter, letting her be herself, letting myself be myself, loving others and myself (hard yes... but so necessary)... on and on... all CHOICES.

OK, Meredith.. a bit deep for a Sunday (the last Sunday of January 2008 and the one month birthday of my newest nephew)... I agree completely!!! Where did this all come from?? Well, I am usually VERY anti making New Years resolutions... as I am usually very anti things that a lot of people do... stubborn nature in myself, lol. BUT, this year I feel very different. Last year was in all a very difficult year personally... between losing a friend that I felt like I had a long future with, working because I felt like I "had" to do and thus creating major stress in my whole family's life due to my unhappiness, to other struggles... I feel like I let last year happen instead of making it happen, if that makes sense. 2008 WILL be a year that I make HAPPEN... mark my words on Sunday, January 27, 2008!!!

With all of these deep thoughts... I think this picture sums up everything I feel right now! Here are three children (Lila-5, Kaya-2, John-8) enjoying a simple moment with sticky plastic bugs... we can all learn a lot from this picture... and I plan on doing just that TODAY and tomorrow's TODAY (as every day is a new TODAY in my vision for 2008). Enjoy TODAY every day!! Now, I off to do the one "must" of showering, LOL.